Joy Unpeakable

So after prayer, chatting with my sisters, and many hours of contemplation I have discovered that the grieving process takes a LONG time. As you know from my previous post, I have been feeling very blue lately. I am sure now that it was a combination of things, especially not getting enough alone/quiet time. In missing out on this time, I have pushed certain feelings aside and not let them be expressed in any way. This has erupted into sadness... The importance of alone time for me is to just be able to pray and sort through my life; things that have happened, are going on, and coming up.

After getting some much needed me-time, I realize that I really miss my mom. I miss talking to her about my pregnancy and Mae, what she will be like. How, even after having one baby, I am still scared about the delivery. I want to tell her about my super fun shower, and how wonderful my sisters and friends are. And, I miss that joyful sound in her voice when she would tell me how happy she is and excited she is about her new granddaughter...

I also realize that I have many wonderful friends that I need to call on when I need them. I am so blessed to have friends that love me and my family, and that would do anything we need, when we need them. God is so faithful in this way. His body is not only for His glory, but also for our benefit. We are to bear with one another in Love... take care of each other, as members of one body. I just love God's word, and how it never fails to comfort and bring me joy.

So other than the tears during the writing of this post, I am feeling very joyful. I woke up feeling joyful! This last week I have been able to catch up with friends, have some much needed me-time, and I started to feel an overwhelming sense of excitement for the arrival of my sweet Mae, Mazie Judith Tucker. Named after mom, Judith Elaine Moore.

"Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning. You have turned my mourning into dancing; you have losed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, that my Glory may sing your praise and not be silent. O Lord, my God, I will give thanks to you forever!!" Psalm 30:5, 11-12

Finding the time...

Well, the plan for today was to get out in the yard and do a little gardening... Something that I LOVE to do. BUT, it is very windy-not exactly great gardening conditions for a pregnant lady with balance issues. Instead we are going to scrub the house. However, I am feeling a little on the blue side today. Something about being Mommy 24-7 and cleaning house and being 7 months pregnant and never getting a break is getting to me today. I am sure that it is a common condition among stay-at-home Mommies, but when do we get a break?? Is it a discipline thing? I have never been good at taking time for myself. When Jane is gone, I miss her and wish we were hanging out. I don't like finding baby-sitters. I am not good at just calling up friends and saying- hey let's go do whatever. So my biggest problem is me, I guess. Friends, what I need is some good old accountability. Someone to remind me that this is a need, not a want, and that we all could use a little break from responsibility.

Moving right along

So the last week has been filled with painting, moving furniture, assembling furniture, installing light fixtures, cleaning out closets, organizing toys, books and bedding, buying mattresses, and of course the overall clean-up. We have successfully completed stage one-The Girls' Room, minus curtains and wall-art. It looks pretty good. Chris was a trooper. He had a positive attitude during the entire project, even though he had to do the bulk of the hard work. Jane is enjoying her new room and getting very excited about her baby sister. She is such a big girl. She is going to be a big help when we have the baby. She LOVES doing her chores; making her bed, feeding Lucy-the cat, picking up her shoes, etc. Hopefully the love for helping out will only grow:)
It is hard to believe that baby Tucker will be here in less than 13 weeks!!